OK so last night I saw the most offensive ad on television that I have ever seen.
Naturally, it was an ad for ‘feminine hygiene’ products or as I prefer to call them as ‘infiltrative poisonous capitalism swabs’. This ad featured some hot spunky south american chicks and some dodgy looking south american ‘baddie’ and they’re all looking at each other conspiratorially, one chick gets patted down for some reason then next thing there’s supposed ‘good guys’ all around and they’re pushed into a courtyard and surrounded. All the ‘bad guy’s’ look around at the chick who promptly lifts her shirt to reveal a pad stuck to her stomach and underneath? You guessed it, a microphone.
OK SO WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH WHETHER OR NOT THAT PRODUCT DOES WHAT I WOULD WANT IT TO DO?
I remember when I was young there was ads on television which we all joked about. They featured a woman demonstrating how good company x’s product was. She would pour blue liquid on pads and we would all watch as the pad dutifully sucked up the liquid. I remember one evening seeing a stand-up comedian on the news mocking these ads mercilessly because they were so patronising towards women. The key line of her derision was of cause the commonly known fact that blood is indeed red, not blue.
So what the hell has happened in the last decade or two that has got this form of advertising to such a pathetically bad level? Even if I actually regularly used these mainstream bleach poison products I would be offended by these ads? Surely?
Am I a freak? Are there any other women out there as unimpressed with these ads as me?
Ah fuck it, where’s my sponge.